2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize