They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
So much rum. So many feels.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize