so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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