Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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