I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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