Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
