CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
