Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Randomize
