No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
