do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
