you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
