But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
