so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
