I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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