Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
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