can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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