I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I am available for nakedness
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
