We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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