Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Randomize
