I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
