it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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