On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You made out with two different species that night
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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