I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize
