thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
