she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
