Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
