We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Randomize
