no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Randomize
