People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Randomize
