Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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