So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
