I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I want you more than these girls want KFC
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
