hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Randomize
