I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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