Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
