Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
