we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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