He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
