This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
