elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
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