We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
