sorry about calling you the devil all night.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
