ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
