It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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