I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
vagina is talking i cant
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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