You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
