oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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