I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
When are your genitals available?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
