why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Acid is not a monday night drug
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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