perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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